We are almost at a mighty milestone of 6 months of age, and this week has really been one of challenges and ups and downs for our little bear. He began the week feeling under the weather and I think that knocked him for six a bit. Here's what happened in the last week of Paddington's first 6 months on this planet!
1 - Sleep diaries.
Sleep goals: 3 hours in the day and let's try for 3 hours straight at night - positive mental attitude right?!
Sleep reality: a bit up and down in the day this week from almost 6 hours one day, as wee man wasn't feeling great to less than 2 hours the following couple of days. Inconsistent would be the word to sum up this week's sleep pattern!
Same goes at night, overall averaging between 1-2 hours max at any one time and waking up still around 6-8 times a night, and he is now refusing to sleep in his cot at all, but I am overjoyed to report he did 3.5 hours straight one night (after me trying for 4 whole hours to get him to sleep in his cot to no avail, I caved in and brought him into the bed for a feed but before I could whip the boob out he fell asleep and I daren't move him for fear of him waking again, and that was the right decision as he slept and so did I!) The next eve he did another 3 hour block, so that's great, but again, it was in our bed rather than the cot so feels like a bit of a regression though I am not knocking the increased volume of sleep on 2 consecutive nights!
I also got a cheeky 2 hour daytime nap this week, in a bed all to myself as well!, so I could stretch out and roll freely, and it was the deepest sleep I have had in months I swear. I had a few weird dreams in that time and felt really disorientated when I woke up but boy did I need to get some actual proper sleep for once, so thanks to my mum who looked after Paddington and allowed me to sneak off for a sleep.
2. Separation anxiety?!
I read about separation anxiety starting in babies around 6 months. Apparently it can cause them to wake up frequently in the night crying just because they want you. They simply want a cuddle and to know you are there and then they are ok and can go back to sleep. This is exactly what is happening with Paddington, and has been for a good few weeks really, but definitely this week, he is waking up screaming and as soon as I hug him, he is back to sleep. He hasn't needed to burp or wind as much this week in the night, it has really been about wanting or needing comfort.
He is definitely showing signs of really wanting me this week and needing to be sure I am always near. If I leave the room or his sight in the day, he looks for me and gives me a huge smile when I return and if he goes for a hug with someone else he is always checking that I am still nearby. He isn't whiny or funny about it, just definitely checking I don't go too far. It's a rather awesome feeling to be honest, to be wanted and needed this much. I try to always tell him that I will be back, I will always come back, if I leave the room or leave him with someone for a bit so he will feel safe and happy. Ah, you big cuddly softy Pads!
3. My baby loves a sneeze!
Forget You tubing panda sneezes, when your baby sneezes it really is the cutest thing. And Pads is now following every sneeze with an adorable smile or little chuckle and a knowing look as he finds them very funny. If there are two or three in a row then that is pure delight. Sneezing does feels good, who can argue with that?
4. A big leap forward
Pads has just reached the end of the 5th Wonder Weeks leap which is all about learning the relationships between things - like him being fascinated with dropping toys on the floor to hear the sounds they make. This has been a long old leap and I really feel like Pads has grown and developed a lot over the past few weeks and seems almost like a new little person.
He is busier than he has ever been and he is into everything, whether it's touching or stroking new fabrics or wanting to pick anything up and put it in his mouth; to chatting and shouting away and playing with volumes and different sounds from gargles to shrieks; to rolling with speed and ease in either direction, sometimes over and again for fun; to desperately trying to crawl using his head on the floor and his bum up in the air and managing to sort of shuffle or pivot to move around the floor; to always wanting to be on his tummy now if you put him on his back; to relishing kicking his legs up into the air and crashing them down with some force and putting his feet into his mouth constantly; to being interested in food and cups and mouths in general, in particular wanting to always put his hands and fingers into mine whenever possible to try and figure it out; to really intently watching me speak and sing as if he is storing the words for later; to finding things funny whether it's being tickled, to a game of peek-a-boo in the high chair where I duck under the tray out of sight and bounce up to surprise him (massive laughs usually!); to trying to sit up by himself but usually lolling to one side or folding forwards; to even more disturbed sleep as he just wants to be practicing his rolling and crawling attempts all the time.
He is a hot bed of learning, experimenting, practicing, impatience, frustration and growth this week and has just suddenly been able to do so much more and thus want to do even more still.
He is also much more fun because he can do more and is trying out new things all the time and he loves to smile and laugh. There is a real untouchable beauty in your baby finding things funny and looking at you with a cheeky expression or a look that says 'you crack me up mum' if you have made them laugh. Those laughs, smiles and looks are worth all the money in the world.
He has become quicker to lose his temper now too when he gets bored or frustrated with something and let's me know when he wants me to pick him up with outstretched arms and looking at me with a hugely appealing glare or crying out.
He definitely seems a little clingier and more of a mummy's boy at the moment, needing and wanting me more for comfort at night and in the day when he gets cranky. He has never been a fan of being put down to sleep but now he wakes EVERY time I try whether day or night, and cries until I pick him up. I just can't do cry it out so not sure what to do about this! It's as if he just really wants extra comfort and security, perhaps because he wasn't well at the start of the week I don't know.
Of course, a consequence of all of this learning and need to be as close to me as possible is that he is now refusing to sleep in his cot at all. No joke. He has always done at least the first few hours at night in the cot. Now, as soon as I put him in it, he starts cry shouting and then this escalates pretty quickly into loud wails, and he won't be soothed unless I pick him up, whereby he usually promptly falls straight back to sleep, but if I try and put him back in the cot again, we are back to the cries and shouts again. This isn't good and feels like a further regression, as how are we supposed to be getting him ready to sleep on his own in his own room as they recommend from around 6 months on if he won't sleep in the cot anymore?!!! (Not that we have a room ready to move him into yet anyway!)
I love the extra cuddles and feeling so wanted of course but am worried that we seem to be going backwards in terms of him becoming any more independent, and then the doubt creeps in doesn't it, and you start to play other people's judgements over and over in your head: 'you shouldn't have started co-sleeping, you've made a rod for your own back', 'you spoilt him by letting him nap on you and not putting him down to sleep earlier' , 'you need to be tougher and let him cry it out, then he'll learn to self soothe' etc etc...
Perhaps he would now be sleeping 12 hours straight every night if I had let him cry it out in the first few weeks and always put him to sleep in his cot without fail. Perhaps he wouldn't. I just did what I had to and what felt right as a new mum in responding to my baby's needs to make him feel safe and secure. Who is to say what the right approach is? It just needs to be right for you. Right?!
I have decided to do some reading up on sleep training options to make an informed choice about which way to go next however, to get us all more sleep, as I know what we have been doing can't go on forever, more than anything because Pads will need some independence soon as he is getting bigger. But for now, we will keep muddling on, as he needs me and I need to be there for him. A change is coming soon though.
5. Feeding time is becoming more of a boxing ring.
I am currently either getting whacked in the face by a flailing arm; bruised by a freakishly strong clenching grip; nipped or cut by pinching claws; scratched by exploring fingernails; kicked in the stomach, or worse!, by excited little legs; getting my mouth/nose/eyes/face in general pulled, pinched and poked at; and generally getting half beaten up by my feeding son.
To say he is exploring his surroundings and no longer able to quietly do one thing is an understatement. I have a stonkingly good deep browny blue bruise on my right boob and I look like I have been attacked by an angry cat across my clavicle and collarbone. It's quite the look. Am hoping this is just a phase and doesn't become the norm as it can be quite painful and the knee jerk reaction is just to remove him from the boob and say 'no more until you can be nice!', but that doesn't really work with babies does it?!
He has also, mainly in bed at night, started reaching out with both of his hands to help bring the milk-maker to him quicker and if it isn't flowing quite as he would like, he'll give my boob a few proper firm little squeezes. This is a boy who knows what he wants and he wants it now please!
6. Rain rain please...piss off!
This weather is shit right? I got very cross last weekend as the rain ruined our plans. I tried to go for a lovely long canal walk with my boy and got us all dressed up for a wintery ramble, the sky was blue and it was crisp but clear, and the forecast said it was dry all day.
20 minutes into our walk and this grey cloud just seemed to blow in off the Brecon Beacons and surround us and then the heavens opened. I got soaked despite the waterproofs, I had to put the rain cover over Pads in the buggy, which he hates as it gets all steamed up and he can't see out, so then he screamed his head off. I had to shelter under 3 bridges with a screaming baby and watch the rain pelt down onto the canal water then try to manoeuvre our thankfully brilliant all terrain buggy through the muggy puddly bog that the path had become. It was a disaster. And the next few days we had planned similar outings and they were all along these lines - me getting soaked and quite flustered pushing a screaming baby in a steamed up covered buggy. And the worst bit is trying to pack away a wet and muddy buggy into a car and get a screaming baby out of a pram suit and into a car seat in the driving rain. Definition of not fun I'd say.
7. Bug a boo.
Early on in the week Pads had a little bug bless him, which began with forceful projectile vomiting overnight soaking me and him and requiring a change of outfit for both of us three times. This was not like him at all and he was very upset before and after throwing up as if it had really hurt him.
I was quite worried so I took him to the docs the next day and she checked him over thoroughly and said that all his vitals were fine, and he was quite happy and calm by this point, but she said he could've had a little bug that had unsettled him.
He then chucked up again, though not projectile, as soon as we were in the waiting room after seeing the doctor and once again in the car on the way home, which is definitely not his norm, so I cancelled our plans for that day and we had an at home day. And I am glad we did as he slept for just under 6 hours in the day!
He was super drowsy and just wanted to lay on me and sleep, and wake up just to feed and have a cuddle and then go back to sleep again- no kicking about or trying to roll or any of his usual manically energetic activities so he must have felt under the weather.
The next day he seemed almost back to his usual spirited self, which was so good to see, so we took it easy again and didn't go swimming this week because he had been vomiting, and he now seems back on form again. I am so glad as it isn't nice to see him so out of character and dozy and docile when he is usually such an alert live wire.
The doctor recommended we postpone weaning until Pads was over his bug so we are now starting this weekend - wish us luck!
8. I want to be your 'breast' friend.
I am now a fully trained Solihull approach peer breastfeeding supporter! I have loved learning more about the wonders and ins and outs of breastfeeding and how to tactfully, safely and sensitively help other mums on their breastfeeding journeys. I would love to help as many mums as possible to keep or start breastfeeding, so if you ever need any help or support, or know anyone who does, I am here for you, whoever you are and wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Until next week, stay classy.
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