Week 5 - the re-learning week

Week 5

We can't believe how quickly our little boy is growing up.  He is smiling more, mimicking us more and just giving us more and more joy and amazement day by day.  Jon got to experience a smile first-hand this week which was brilliant, as he has had to take my word for it so far.  Its been tough with him away in London in the week, for all of us, and probably more so for him as he feels like he is missing out and he just wants to be with his gorgeous son.  I'm the lucky one, as though the nights are long and the responsibility is huge, I get to be with our little bug all the time so I never miss a moment.  

I have had to learn to re-learn or rather, adjust and take on board different advice for things I thought I had down this week.  This is an ever evolving job, being a parent, and its so worth putting in the hours and trying to be the best parent you can be - but as I have also learnt, try and give yourself a bit of a break and don't expect it all to fall into place immediately, or even for a very very long time (if ever?!!!)

Here's what we learnt in week 5.

1. Sleeping 'through the night'. We have reached the holy grail. Our little bug slept 'through the night' once this week! I don't mention this to be smug as it was just the once and I do not know how to repeat it, but it feels like progress and a turning point in our world of chasing sleep. Now, just to clarify 'sleeping through the night' means sleeping 5 hours straight, so its great of course, but it is a bit disappointing that it isn't a full adult 8hours isn't it?!! It was after a feed & some burping & in his Sleepyhead (*Sleepyhead success rate update for this week: 100% - he has slept in it every single night for a minimum of 3 hours overall, usually longer. Boom!!!) The contributing factors to this gorgeous stretch of sleep, which we all benefitted in were: 

It was nice and dark and quiet in the room; we were both calm and relaxed; the feed was a good length but not too long; we did the side lying breast feeding position which is one of our favs at night or early morning as its chilled and comfy for us both and most conducive to sleep; he burped during winding so his tummy was relieved; I stroked his head after laying him down to make sure he settled and to encourage his eyes to close; and I have stopped changing so many nappies through the night as it just wakes him up and takes us back to square one again so I didn't do my usual nappy change after a feed as I had been doing before (of course I'll change a nappy if it feels very full or if I've heard an 'explosion' if you will, but otherwise, we're leaving them on longer in the night). So have I uncovered the secret formula for my baby's sleep, or was he just tired enough?! Watch this space.  

2. I still have no idea what I am doing. No really. Not a clue. Just when I think I might be getting the hang of one aspect of this baby rearing, Paddington throws me a curve ball or changes what he's been doing previously, throwing me back to the beginning of feeling pretty clueless and out of my depth. 

Case in point: Nappies - I thought I totally had nappy changing nailed down. I am very fast at the changeover now and have a good, organised system going, with everything within easy reach. However, he's started 'surprise weeing' more often during a change & my nappy wee blocker technique is no longer catching the flow, hence we end up with pee all over him and me and his clothes so I have to change his whole outfit which distress him and prolongs the whole process.  

2nd case: Winding. We had a good thing going with the over the shoulder burping technique followed by the tummy down on arm and vigorous rubbing method, the combination of which usually resulted in a nice bass-toned man burp. Now, de nada. Nothing. No burp, when he clearly needs to burp. Just a crying baby.  

3rd case: We had the beginnings of a bed time routine emerging that culminated in a good feed session that made Pads sleepy, so he'd drift off peacefully straight after giving us all some sleep, either where he lay or after half an hour or so when properly asleep, I could get him in the Sleepyhead for a nice snoozing session. However, one particular night this week, he did his usual fall asleep after the feed but only slept for 8mins and was then wide awake and wouldn't be settled by anything other than more boob. We had fed very well throughout the day as usual so there wasn't any obvious reason for the extra hunger (growth spurt perhaps?). 

So yes I have to admit that I still have no clue what I am doing. I am winging this and have done a good job of 'faking' it so far I think but I am about to be exposed as the rookie that I am. 

3. Bed wetting. 2 nights on the trot Paddington wet the bed (or rather his Sleepyhead, then my bed) and was soaked through. Why?!! We are back using the 'good' nappies now and its all been going very well, so I thought. I looked into it and am pretty sure it was my fault and I've had to take myself back to nappy changing school. I had become more about speed and efficiency of nappy changing than accuracy. Here's what I wasn't doing and probably caused the wetting through the night-time nappies, as he is a serious wriggler and kicker so nappies need to be put on absolutely right or there will be problems, as I am now very aware! 

His winky needs to be pointing down in the nappy or when he wees it will fill up the top part of the nappy that isn't as absorbent and then leak. I am guilty of not always checking this. I had been dutifully folding down the waistband, once tightly fastened, to stop up-the-back incidents so I could pat myself on the back for that but I wasn't aware that the 'frills' around the legs needed to be pulled out and not bunched up too to help stop leg leakages. And finally, as he's such an energetic wriggler and kicker when being changed and its quite the challenge to just put a new nappy on, I hadn't been checking that they were pulled up high enough either so often I had put them on too low down, way below the bellybutton, so again, leaving it open season for leakages. I have learnt my lesson now as having to wash the whole Sleepyhead and change my bed back to back was a right palava. 

I now have a 10 step Nappy changing checklist/regime to stick to so I don't get stuck with a wet baby, bed and beyond! 

   1. Put a clean nappy underneath the dirty one before taking off to catch any sly wees or poos during the change as well as the wee blocker on the tum and a cotton wool pad on the winky to soak it up at the source! 

  2. Wipe clean with water wipes front to back then dry with cotton wool pad (as cotton wool ball leaves annoying bits of fluff behind that stick to his privates and are very tricky to pick off a wriggling baby!) 

  3. Apply nappy cream only if skin is red or sore. 

  4. Make sure his winky is pointing down before pulling on the new nappy 

  5. Once cleaned, position nappy nice and high up the waist and back 

  6. Fasten nappy as tightly as possible still giving little one room to breath and not cutting off the circulation of course! 

  7. Fold down the waistband of the nappy neatly 

  8. Pull out the leg frills 

  9. Do final checks: make sure nappy isn't bunched up at the back, fits well all over and is nice and tightly done up.  

  10. Put the dirty nappies and cleaning materials straight into the bin (its easy to forget you've put them to one side and come back later to a not so nice pooey/straw like smell (think this is the chemicals in the nappy, very strange). I am guilty of having done this on a few occasions.  

TOP TIP: we have a Sangenic Tommee Tippee nappy bin and it is brilliant.  We have it right next to the changing table. You just pop the dirty nappy in along with any dirty wipes/cotton wool balls, then twist the lid so it wraps the nappy in a bag that stops it smelling and it can hold a good 25 or so nappies before you need to change the bag.  Highly recommended.)  

4. Weight off my mind. We had our first visit to the Health clinic, as its now been 2 weeks since he was last weighed, and I was keen to check that we were going in the right direction. The waiting room was full of mums and babies - why wouldn't it be?! - and Pads started to get a bit grizzly as we sat and waited which I found a tad stressful, again, fretting that the other mums would think I didn't have it all under control if he was crying when all the other babies around him were either sleeping soundly, playing happily or just being plain quiet. (Why does that keep happening, that mine is the only crying/unsettled baby in the room?!) Just as I was about to get a bit flustered though, I stood up and rocked Pads back and forth whilst sshing and took him over to some old black and white photos of the surgery on the wall which piqued his interest and wonderfully, the crying ceased and I did look like I had it under control. Fake it 'til you make it right?! 

He then proceeded to scream his head off after we were called in by the nurse while I undressed him and during the weighing, but the good news is that my big beautiful boy has put on lovely weight and is exactly where he should be on 'the 'charts'. He's my 8.6lbs bundle of joy now. Excellent - we must be doing something right then!  

5. Dummy debate. We have resisted using a dummy so far as I haven't really found a good enough reason to use one yet thankfully, am not saying I won't and I have no issue with them or anyone who uses them (you have to do what you can to get by I say!), but until its absolutely necessary, I wanted to avoid them. We have had 3 incidents in the car where he was relentlessly crying on the motorway to the point where Jon and I almost joined in it was so upsetting to see him so upset, so I gave him my finger to suck and it totally worked to soothe him and calm him down and after about 10mins of suckling on my finger 'nipple' he went off to sleep, so if that's what a dummy can do, I am impressed. We have a fresh packaged dummy in our emergency basket, ready to go if we do need it (along with those nipple guards I bought last week and some 'just in case' infant calpol ready for after his immunisations in a few weeks). 

6. Moses basket success! I set myself a challenge to get him to sleep in his moses basket in the day. I started by raising the head end of the stand up on 2 hard books (Mary Berry's 'Cook it now, eat it later' and Miles Irving's 'The Forager's Handbook' in case you were wondering) thanks to a suggestion by my ante-natal pal, Bethan. This helps alleviate any reflux or wind apparently as he isn't lying flat and the head is then higher than the feet to try and prevent any semi-digested milk rising up and disturbing him. I then tried to coax him into a sleep after a lovely feed and kept placing him in the basket when he was just about to fall asleep on me. It took a good few attempts of him really looking like he had drifted off in there after some singing and stroking, so I would tip toe away, only for him to start wriggling then telling me he was having none of it a minute later. I was about to throw in the towel, when I remembered a friend's suggestion, so I grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around my chest and tummy to warm it with my epic body heat (and for those of you that don't know this, I am actually the hottest human on earth. Fact. So if you want want something warmed up in moments/if the earth ever freezes over and you need a heat source, I'm your gal), then fed him lying down on the bed - the best position to get him sleepy - then let him doze on the bed a bit after he had finished feeding. Once settled, I picked him up, placed the warmed blanket on the moses mattress and sheet then lowered him onto it. He wriggled a bit as I draped another blanket on top of him, made an adorable guinea pig-esque squeak and then slept happily (and snugly no doubt) for 40minutes. He then stirred so I went to his side and observed, practicing the don't-rush-in approach, and he settled himself and went to back to sleep for another 2 hours 15 mins. This is huge progress and a win for the hottest human on earth! (Trademark).

You think I'd be ecstatic that he went to sleep on his own and that I could enjoy some free time with both my hands, but I actually just missed him and wanted to be with him so I found it hard to rest and kept going to check on him regularly. He was absolutely fine each time. I need to work on my separation anxiety, not him, it seems!  

7. Lower your expectations and set smaller goals. I have stopped reading google so much now (still guilty on occasion I'm afraid) but have started reading more select/recommended baby books that friends have found helpful in my thirst for knowledge and quest to understand my baby, and I finally read some reassuring advice. It was in 'Your Baby Week by Week' by Simone Cave & Caroline Fertleman lent to me by my bestie, Bex. It suggests trying to just get your baby to nap for 3hrs in a day as a starting point! Wow. That is much more manegeable than trying to get the 6/7hrs plus that every other source claims every baby must have. It made me remember to scale my expectations down, start small & build from there. (Eventually I want him to be having 3 good length naps a day but we can work towards that). It was such good, simple advice and we are almost getting this quota everyday already so it made me feel like I was actually doing ok. We are both in training and these things, well every thing, is just going to take time.  

 8. Toy story. I stole this idea from the lovely Laura, after changing Pads on her changing mat and marvelling at how calm and happy he was. The reason? She had lined the mat with small toys that he could look at to distract him from the cold air on his skin and the indignity of being naked and wiped. So at home on our changing table, I lined up a host of fun friends for him along one side including his favourite, Peter Rabbit (think its because his features contrast well with his face so its easier for Pads to make him out), and a couple of teething toys and a mirror book along the other side, and he's now, often, not always of course as that would be too easy!, much calmer and happier at the changing table. And the toys have only been peed on a couple of times so far...  

9. Use other mums for sound, tried and tested advice. I also turned to Laura for some advice on breastfeeding as she is 2 kids in on this journey now and has had lots of guidance from a breast feeding counsellor for both babies which she was happy to share and I was grateful to receive. We worked on the biological 'jockey' feeding position and her top tips were to sit in a sturdy, hard chair with supportive cushions behind me and start off at the edge so I had room to lean back once he was latched on properly, then sit Pads down legs either side of my thigh, pulled in nice and tight and to keep my leg stretched out low to ensure Pads was positioned low and would have to reach up to latch on. She then suggested I place a rolled up muslin under the boobaloobs to keep them lifted up and in optimum position for Pads to hang his 'coat on the hook' so to speak (or place his mouth on the nip). These little adjustments made the world of difference, he's feeding much more efficiently in this position now and I can clearly hear his satisfied swallows.  So when in doubt pull him in tighter and position him lower. 

 She also showed me some alternative burping methods which again, were massively helpful as I'd just been relying on the two and now we have more in our repertoire. First was the seated, chin resting on my hand and my other hand rubbing/patting his back technique. This one can also be varied so you do a few pats like this then tip him back gently and then tip him forward again and repeat. The second technique was sitting him in one of my palms with his back pressed up against my chest, facing out and the other hand pressed firmly against his chest. Other mums are the best! Get a mum support and advice network going and you'll soon learn all the best tricks and methods that they really should teach you at ante-natal classes! (Instead of fixating on the birth, why don't they do proper practical parenting lessons at ante-natal classes where you don't just talk about how to do things but actually practice a few times on a doll and get hands-on help at the same time?! I'd vote for the basics that someone should really show you before you go home with an actual baby: how to actually change nappies properly and what to check for; how to actually bathe your baby - the hold you need to secure them and what stuff you need out ready; practical demonstrations of different breast feeding positions and how to burp your baby. I could've benefitted from being shown all of these things and having chance to practice them before Pads came along for sure!) 

Big thanks to all of you who have shared your knowledge so far, you've been my ante-natal teachers, and keep it coming!  

10. Nursing blisters.  I noticed Pads has a little blister on the middle of his top lip, according to google, this means he is feeding well and vigorously and is nothing to be concerned about.  However, when I mentioned it to a friend she had been told by a breastfeeding counsellor that it meant he was feeding too high on the breast so the top of my nip was rubbing against his top lip too much.  Hopefully by working on our positioning as above, this will fix that, but he doesn't seem bothered by the blister and some other sources say it helps stiffen the skin on his lip which then makes it easier to grasp the nip - so who knows?!!  Goes to show that there are no plain and simple answers when it comes to babies!

11. There's an app for that part 3 (and also a very interesting book). I was recommended the 'Wonder weeks' app by one of the ladies at the breastfeeding group and the book was recommended by a friend so I got both. It basically gives insight (refreshingly not advice!), based on 35years worth of scientific research, into the mental/developmental leaps every baby makes, what they learn during these, how this can affect their behaviour i.e make them really fussy/tired/grumpy etc.. and when you can expect these to occur. And do you know what? Its brilliant. Pads has been going through his first leap called 'changing sensations', he's noticing the world around him more more, looking at things for longer and starting to respond more to what he sees, feels, hears and smells and is generally more awake and alert. This is Pads to a tee lately. This is a challenging leap for him as its his first so he's reacting by crying more (tick), being fussier (big tick), feeding more (yup) and wanting more physical contact (yes siree!). He needs me more than ever at the mo', and boy do I need him too. Well buddy I am quite literally all yours and we'll get through this big, scary change together. After all we're a team.  

12. We need to talk about...piles. Ok, this may be t.m.i but this is what they don't tell you about being a new mum. When giving birth, you are very likely to get piles from all the pushing. I got them, they weren't nice but they weren't top of the pain list in the first couple of weeks as there was so much going on, just in the top 3. However, this week I relived the meaning of true tear-inducing, crying out loud, towel rail grabbing pain. Shit, piles are excruciating (and I don't use that word lightly as I've given birth. I know high levels of pain) and why have they suddenly decided to turn the pain factor up to 11 now?!!! The injustice of it all after all my body has been through recently too! I am now on the strongest painkillers, cream and laxatives that I can take whilst breastfeeding and I am praying they take effect soon. I hope that none of you never have to suffer this, its life's cruel joke and it is anything but funny.

On the plus side, the bleeding has stopped this week, so onwards and upwards right?!  

13. Parenthood is the definition of absolute Responsibility. This last thought was pointed out to me by a dad, thanks Rob - its not all about us mums. Don't underestimate the physiological effects of having such a huge responsibility for the rest of your lives when you've only ever had yourselves to look after before and were able to be pretty selfish back then. No longer. Its not about us anymore. We have a life in our actual hands. A tiny person that needs us, looks to us for everything and is being shaped by us and our actions. This is huge. And with great responsibility comes great reward of course but it isn't easy and takes some adjusting and it is now constant, forever, always, that we will be responsible for our little man. It is the greatest honour and also the biggest, scariest job either of us has or will ever have. We're just trying not to screw it (or him) up. 

So 5 weeks have passed and are loving every (well, almost every!) moment.  We also had some great news, that Paddington's dad has got a new job near us and won't need to go down to London in the week anymore very soon, so we will all be together again every day which will make it all the more manageable and enjoyable.  Three is the magic number after all.

Week 4 - the grizzly bear week

Week 4

Our little chap is a month old already - how did that happen!  While time has sort of flown by, it also (usually at silly o'clock in the morning) hasn't.  It's been a particularly grizzly week for our Paddington, he's growing and developing and the world is constantly changing around him as he is able to take in more and more information and details, so I think he's reacting to all of this with a slightly crankier, fussier approach, which is understandable - I can be funny about change too.  Here's how our 4th week has panned out.



1. The uber grizzles (and the pillow incident). We've had a ride on the grumpy/fussy/cry-baby train this week.  It really started around day 23, just after 6pm.  He would not stop crying. I swear I tried everything in my arsenal but nope, 'not interested mum'.  He clearly had a bad case of the windy pops so we winded patiently (me), whilst screaming/crying purposefully (him), had a sick or two, then carried on crying.  Loudly. He was getting agitated and cross with me, so I'd fluctuate between feeding him, burping him, rocking and sshing him and singing, whilst trying to get him to sleep.  He wasn't having any of it and I had run out of ideas.  This happened again the next evening from about 5.30pm, and the 2 main culprits again were wind and sick, but even when he'd expelled both, he still wasn't happy.  The highlight of this particular evening for me was when I realised I was sitting on the edge of the bed having literally tried every 'soothing/get them to sleep' trick in the books, with a toy sheep stuffed down my bra, a hairdryer blowing loudly in one hand and a baby who was trying to stop crying but didn't know what he wanted in the other arm, with dried sick all down my t-shirt and a glazed expression on my face.  That moment sums up the week for me really, welcome to parenthood indeed.  Everyone says it gets easier though...right?!!!

I threw a pillow across the room on the next uber grizzly eve.  I'm not proud of my behaviour but I was broken and so very very tired and what made it seem even worse was Jon was blissfully asleep and snoring next to me whilst I was doing everything I could think of to calm down our grizzly bear whilst quietly seething that Jon was getting the sleep I so desperately wanted to be getting at that moment.  Jon can literally sleep through anything (he has slept through an air raid alarm before that woke an entire campsite, except him), as Padster's cries are not quiet, they are piercing and incessant, (and I made sure they were close to Jon's ears), yet still no sign of him waking up!  When he did wake, he dared to yawn and I just flipped from exhaustion and sleep jealousy and threw a pillow across the room (actually I threw two).  This is what I have become, a dirty pillow thrower.  


I hadn't realised that it was getting to me until that moment so I think we need to work out a new system one night a week where I get a bit of a break (tricky to do more as Jon works in London when I am in Wales all week which means I have every night with Paddington and deal with whatever mood he's in day and night all week, whereas Jon only gets to spend weekends with us at the moment, which is very hard for him as well.  We miss him and he misses us a lot.)  We are thinking about me going in to the spare room after a feed one night a week for 4 hours to sleep and Jon will deal with any grizzlies/crying/ tantrums etc... for that time and then I'll come back into our room after that sleep to take over.  We haven't tried this yet but even just the thought of that being an option has made it all seem more bearable.  Any other suggestions welcome!

2. The no-cry sleep solution.  No app this week, but I did tuck into a book which the midwife recommended, 'The no-cry sleep solution' by Elizabeth Pantley, which gives gentle suggestions and practical techniques to get your baby to sleep through the night (did you know through the night actually only means 5hrs straight?!!) and gets you to log your babies sleep to work with his pattern and get a routine going.  I, like many new mothers before me, was pretending to read this book 'just out of interest' and to 'see if any of the suggestions seemed worth trying', but secretly I, like many other new mums, was hoping it would provide all the answers I'd been looking for and do as it said on the cover, get my baby to sleep without crying.  And it may well still do that one day, but it sure ain't an overnight solution unfortunately.   

The book suggested doing a log of little man's sleep and nap patterns over a 24hr period, aswell as noting down his pre-bedtime routine to see if anything could be tweaked to aid sleep.  It was an interesting experiment, though I think its more geared towards older babies of about 4 months plus who may have more of a 'routine' or 'pattern' to work with.  At the start of the week and end of week 3, I thought a sort of sleep 'pattern' (and I use the term very loosely!) might be emerging as 5 nights in a row he'd pretty much gone to sleep between 9.30pm - 11pm for around 3 hours in one hit, give or take half an hour.  However, just as soon as I'd noticed this and started to raise my hopes, the next 2 nights he didn't sleep until after midnight and in very erratic blocks, waking frequently for feeds or fussing.  
What I did notice in the logs I did is he only napped for 3hrs 15 mins that day and that was largely due to me putting him in the sling to send him to sleep.  I need to work on getting him to nap more definitely.  It also emerged that he does have a basic pre-bedtime routine that we can certainly build on and keep up so it becomes his normal.  We tend to do a big feed, then winding, then a bath and/or nappy change, into his sleepy suit, some cuddles, another nurse but this time in bed whilst reading a bed time story, then into his Sleepyhead for sleep time.  That's the idea anyway and I reckon that's a good routine to implement early on.  
The author suggest lots of helpful things to encourage and facilitate sleep, which are gentle and certainly not rocket science but things that aren't always obvious when you're faced with a tired baby who really needs you to help them get some sleep. We will be trying them out with vigour when he's a bit older I think - I don't want to put too much pressure on either of us just yet as it really is still very early days (something I do need to keep reminding myself and something I want to enjoy whole-heartedly as they aren't this little for long! I sort of wish he'd stay like this for ever as even though he's a huge challenge, he's just so adorable and I love the way he really needs me!).  I have experimented with the ideas that resonated the most with me already though, to see if they could work for us.
Her main suggestions that I think are worth trying are: coming up with key words or sounds as a sleep cue, so I've made up a sleep ditty/lullaby which I'm employing already to get him used to it and associate it with sleep. It rhymes and is easy to sing when I have little to no energy in the dead of the night.  It isn't Andrew Lloyd Webber, but it is memorable and simple. 
She also suggests giving tummy rubs and putting my hand on his head for gentle strokes to soothe him without picking him up, as picking him up can wake him up more. And her key piece of advice, which I am guilty of not always doing, is to always put him down/in to bed when trying to get him to sleep at night, as holding him makes it harder to then put him down once asleep and is a habit that can be hard to break, as its so lovely to have him sleep on me but not sustainable. (Cute now, not so much when he's 2 years old I can imagine).  
He slept like this on the night I logged him: after I put him down for sleep at 10pm, he slept for 3mins then cried. I winded him and sang our 'lullaby'. He kept crying, more high pitched this time so I nursed him in bed again, winded him and tried to put him down for sleep again with the lullaby and his 'lovie' (see point 3). It was now 11pm. After 15mins of my best efforts, he still wouldn't settle so I picked him up, rocked him, sshd him etc then fed him. Another winding session and back down to try and sleep. It was now midnight. He fell asleep finally after 18minutes of me singing our lullaby and giving him tummy rubs and head strokes. 

He slept for 2hrs 45 mins before waking. It was now just after 3am. I tried the hand on head stroking technique and he was back to sleep within a couple of minutes for another hour. Boom! It was now 4.30am. He then had very erratic sleeps: for 8mins, then wanted to be fed and winded, then slept for another 50mins - my hand stroking his head for a few minutes got him back to sleep, then another 15mins sleep before he woke again hungry and in need of a nappy change. It was now 5.45am. Then 8mins of sleep, a lullaby and head stroke sent him off again for another 10mins before he woke again, more singing & stroking got another 20mins sleep, then he woke wanting a feed. It was now 6.30am. Feeding and winding and re-settling took 1.5hrs then another hour and a half sleep later, he finally woke for the day at 9.20am.  It was surprisingly hard work to try and get him to sleep each time. 
It was really helpful to see how much he wakes up in an evening and that it was possible to get him back to sleep with simple techniques that do require a lot of patience and repetition, but do also seem to work and could work much better and hopefully quicker after practice and once he becomes accustomed to them and they become his sleep 'cues'. I need to work harder at doing these rather than always relying on giving him boob, as this then requires winding which unsettles him after the sleep inducing feed, or always picking him up which obviously disturbs him and could lead to bad habits further down the line.   It has definitely made me look at sleep and how to achieve it in a new light but I won't beat myself up about trying everything every night just yet or getting a routine going until he's a bit older.  I am enjoying newborn sleep snuggles too much if I am being totally honest.


3. The pressure is on, Woolly.  Another idea from the sleep book which I liked, was to introduce a 'lovie' or snuggler that he can become familiar with over time and can help comfort and soothe him. I chose a toy sheep comforter, so I slept with it one evening (the evening of epic grizzlies described in point 1 where I had the toy sheep stuffed down my bra.). The sheep is called Woolly (original I know) and I'm expecting BIG things from him. I put Paddington in his Sleepyhead on Friday eve, once he had tired himself out enough, and put Woolly beside him, and he did fall asleep pretty quickly with one hand resting on Woolly's fleecy body.  It was probably more from weariness to be honest, but I like to think the sheep played a small part. Will keep you posted. (Woolly is also very good at being my scratch protector - I've been placing him on my chest when little man has a tantrum to save me from scratches, so he's come in handy already)

4. Faster drinking = more burping.  Pads has started to spend less time at the boob finally, partly because he's drinking a bit faster and he's sucking more efficiently.  However, the faster drinking does mean that he gulps in more air so needs burping after every feed now, and he does not have the patience for that.  He's also been getting more hiccups this week, probably daily, and he's not a fan of those either.  They are mega hiccups though, much bigger than him and they last a good 5-10 minutes usually.  I thought the best way to help him through the hiccups was to carry out winding techniques, but have been told that distraction is the best remedy so we've now made it into a 'Paddington vs the hiccups' battle with singing and encouraging words from me, coupled with back rubs and pats to soothe him and walking around.  

5. Possett deposits. You know last time I said he was hardly being sick at all? Well, I spoke too soon.  Now he's posetting!  On my dress, top, the bed, down my bra, in my face, over his dad's shoulder, on himself etc... and it often makes him very upset & agitated.  I don't blame him, I hate being sick more than anything.  This is probably due to his faster eating too. I'm also pretty sure I have caught him swallowing sick back down a couple of times too, greedy little tyke!, (is this a newborn thing?!) so I need to keep a look out for that, not just because its a bit gross, but it can't be good for him right?!!
6. Sleep, glorious sleep, and the feeding frenzy that followed! He slept for 7.5 hrs between 10pm - 8am one night this week, not in one hit of course, but still, its the most sleep we've all had since he arrived so were are eternally grateful.  The day after, he went on a feeding frenzy however, like he thought he'd never eat again and totalled 16 feeds in the whole day and night, and was a cranky monster when not on the boob, refusing to nap at all in the day!  My nipples were sore from all the feeds and his vigorous sucking and it got to the point where he was on one boob, and the other would start leaking, so I'd switch him over to that one, and so on, all day.  Jon found it hard to watch me in pain and discomfort again and felt really helpless bless him as he just doesn't have milky bosoms -  more's the pity - so wasn't able to help much during this feed-a-thon.  I have ordered some emergency nipple guards in case Paddington keeps up this frequency and urgency of feeding as I don't think my nips can sustain this day in day out. 


This just goes to show there will be good days & bad days back to back and its definitely still too soon to be hoping for any sort of routine, other than knowing that no 2 days are the same!

7. Get to know you baby's sleepy sounds.  The best thing that came out of reading the sleep book, was learning to notice the difference between Paddington's 'sleepy sounds' and his stirring/ 'I'm awake and need you now' noises.  I had been jumping to his side with a willing full boob at the very start of a whimper, grunt, suck or cry previously, believing I was being a good, responsive mummy and always ensuring he woke to the comfort of me being right by his side, with food at the ready, but it turns out that on some of those occasions, he was probably still actually asleep and I was un-knowingly and un-necessarily waking him up.  


Once I realised that babies cry, whimper, gurgle, snort, even open their eyes a bit, stretch and wriggle whilst still asleep, I noticed that our baby does this a lot when sleeping. It really seems like he's about to fully wake up, but if I waited a few seconds or a minute or so first to see which way the latest noise was going to go, about 6 times out of 10, he'd just be making sleepy sounds and would fall right back to peaceful sleep.  Amazing revelation for me and we're all sleeping better and for longer now I am aware of this, so my advice would be, wait a bit before rushing in, as they can look like they are about to start crying and even cry a few times out loud, but in their sleep, so give it a few moments to see if its an awake noise or sleepy sound before you act.

8. Confession of a sleep deprived parent! To wake or not to wake?  I need to make a confession.  

I let Paddington sleep for 4.5hrs one night before feeding him - we both really needed the sleep but I felt huge pangs of guilt for not waking him earlier as all the books and guidelines say you should feed your baby every 3-4 hours maximum, even through the night.  

The next evening he fussed so much after his feed & needed a really long winding session, by the time he finally got to sleep it had been 2.5hrs since his feed, but I decided to let him sleep on for both our sakes. He woke up 3hrs15mins later for a feed.  I had already woken up after 2 hours of sleep and spent a good 5 minutes debating whether to wake him up to feed or let him sleep, as it was then 4.5 hours since he'd last been fed, but I reasoned that he would wake up if really hungry and that we both desperately needed more sleep.  (I set my alarm for an hour and a half later and decided that I would wake him then if he hadn't woken earlier so it wasn't crazy long between feeds.  Luckily I didn't need to do this as he woke himself.)  So he went 5hrs 45 mins in total between feeds this night, and you know what?  Everything was ok.  He woke when hungry and I wish I had been able to enjoy the stretch of sleep more without waking up through guilt and worry myself.  

9. Bath time is fun with mum.  Still not loving his baths on his own, we were advised by a friend to try bathing with the little man to get him used to the water whilst feeling safe and close to us.  So I got in a nice warm bath, and this time I made sure it was actually warm, up to waist height and Jon handed me a nudey Paddington.  I placed him in the water up to his waist and against my chest with a boob either side of his head for familiarity and comfort you know, and...he loved it.  We had cuddles, he floated whilst I supported his head and kicked his legs out (basically doing a hands-free backstroke).  I dipped him up to his neck in the water, supporting him carefully at all times, and he was perfectly happy.  We managed a full 10 minutes and were able to give him a wash, plus it was a really lovely bonding experience.  He showed us how relaxed he was by farting after about a minute in and then he did a lovely yellowy poo that floated in bits around us, but I didn't care as we were having such a lovely time and what's a bit of baby poo anyway?!  He slept much better that night too!  This is the way forward for bath time now and I get to have a soak too: win-win.

10. What not to do with a newborn.  Don't drive in torrential rain when you are a nervous driver already, made more nervous by the fact that your one and only newborn son is in the car with you, to a city you don't know your way around, to drop off your car at a garage you've never been to and collect a tiny, tinny courtesy car that the pre-pubescent receptionist informs you has no petrol in it but its ok as you 'should' make it to the nearest petrol station, whilst your one and only newborn son is 

screaming his head off in the car seat.  Don't do this.  It sucks and will make you feel very inadequate.



Luckily, I had my lifey, Tam, with me (you bloody legend you) who kept me from going over the 

edge, helped me get to grips with driving a new car, and told me I was doing great when I felt like I 

was about to stall/or was over-revving the engine like a teenage boy.  I couldn't have done the journeywithout you bud, not without crying and pulling over every 10 minutes anyway I don't think, 

so thank you (and see you for the return journey when I go back to collect the car right?!).  

It's totally ok to freak out about a relatively simple task that you could have managed fine,

or just about fine, before the baby, and if so, then get help, or do as I did and ask your mate to keep 

you company on a stressful outing and pitch it as a fun ‘road trip’ for the 3 of you.

11. Flying solo.  After the above testing road trip, we managed our first solo outings this week, 
so we're feeling very capable and much more confident now.  The first trip was the real test.  

We went to a local breast feeding support group in a kids soft play activity centre which was an assault on all the senses.  The location was so loud with 'disco' music blaring and so, well, dare I say this?!, full of noisy, running kids (it is summer so all the schools and nurseries are out i suppose).  I almost turned straight back around and left as soon as I walked in as it was terrifying.  But, I (wo)manned up and found the table of mums with their boobs out, and met some very lovely ladies.  We chatted about our babies and how breastfeeding was going and I had to change a dirty nappy in front of the other mums which was quite intimidating at first as they all had older kids as well as their babies, who were all several weeks older than mine anyway, so I figured they were all experts whereas I was the newbie, though in hindsight, I'm sure this intimidation feeling was purely of my own invention because being out alone and changing my baby publicly were all new things to us and it is scary being around other mums initially as you wonder if they are secretly judging you, but they really weren't judgey in the slightest, and I'm sure they've been in my exact position before.  Its great that there is a local support group though, and it was lovely to meet local mums who were all very friendly so I will definitely give it another go. It gave me a buzz to be out and about on my own with my little man and I felt like it was a success because I didn't freak out/ forget I had him with me (as if that would ever happen!)/show myself up as the utter parenting novice that I am - a big step towards independence!  

The next day, Paddington and I took a drive in the sunshine and ended up at Skenfrith Castle, randomly.  We had a lovely walk with him in the sling sleeping soundly and I really began to feel like I had a handle on everything and felt free.  It was good for the soul for sure and I'm sure the fresh air is good for the little one.  (In his first 4 weeks on this earth, he has visited 3 historical Welsh buildings - Llantony Priory, White Castle (for a walk with me and his dad) and now Skenfrith Castle - wonder if he'll become a restoration man like George Clark or an architectural historian?!) 

12. Smiles all round.  Paddington achieved a marvellous milestone this week and smiled for the first time.  And it definitely was not wind!  It was the cutest thing I've ever seen and I hope there's many more of those to come.  Makes everything worth it.  He also stuck his tongue out at me after 10 minutes of me looking into his face and sticking my tongue out at him, which is something the midwife had suggested I try to work on his mimicking skills.  He's such a clever boy, if you can smile and stick your tongue out, you can do anything in life, right? (Just look at Miley Cyrus.)

13. Sleepyhead success rate update.  I mentioned previously that the jury was out on the Sleepyhead (the cocoon pillow that you can use for co-sleeping/in a crib), well the verdict is now in, and its great.  I'd say it has a 75% success rate at the moment.  Once he's fed and winded, we've been putting him in it every night and much more often than not, he will sleep in it for a minimum of 2- 3 hours, which is epic as we get to sleep for that time too as we know he's safe and supported and he's still close to us so that we can check on him and respond to him easily and quickly if he wakes (we have it between us on the bed when Jon is home or I place it on Jon's side when its just me and Paddington).   Its also handy to pop him in it in the day when you need your hands free but don't want the faff of putting the sling on or moving the moses basket to other rooms as its really portable and light.  So, thanks dad for buying us the gift of sleep!  (A quick mention for my dad's latest pressie to us is needed here as its a corker: a t-shirt for me that says 'I am so tired' on it and a baby grow for Paddington that says "I'm not tired' - spot on!)
14. We're all in this together. At the end of the week, we got together with the lovely couples, and their new babies, from the NCT ante-natal classes we attended in the latter stages of pregnancy.  It was so reassuring to hear that everyone was going through their own little challenges, whether it be bottle feeding issues or colic struggles and that all of us had doubts over what we were doing and had been over-googling/reading too many baby guide books and absolutely every one of us was having lots of sleepless nights.  None of our babies are the same and we are all just figuring it out as we go along but its good to know we have each other to message in the middle of the night if it all gets too much or if we need some support or advice from someone who is going through the same thing, albeit, differently, to us.  

So, we are a month in and there has been plenty of highs and of course, plenty of 
lows too (it's all about balance, right?!), but we wouldn't change any of it - seriously, not even the 

really shitty long nights!  Our little grizzly bear makes us laugh, cry, wonder, learn, second-guess, 

worry, marvel and smile with pride everyday and I can hardly remember what life was like before 

him anymore.  

Paddington, you rock our world little man, thank you for making life even better!

Week 2 - the 'will we ever sleep again?' week

Week 2

We thought last week was tough. Well, that was just the beginning.  This week has been the hardest week of our lives so far.  (All three of us).  The tiredness has built up to the point that I can no longer open my eyes fully and concentration is at an all-time low.  We have however managed to keep our gorgeous baby boy alive for a whole week which feels like something to really celebrate - if only we had the energy.

Here's what we've learnt and what advice we'd give ourselves about week 2.

1. The breastfeeding roller coaster will continue and probably step up a gear - keep asking for help.  Just when we thought we were getting it, Paddington stopped latching as well as he had been last week, was feeding for around an hour on average per boob again when I'd read they should be getting all they need within around 30 mins by now (I know, I know, I should take my own advice and stop reading and comparing so much), he also started to get stressed at the nip and slipping off, or worse, clamping down in frustration (this really really hurts by the way).  As a consequence I lost my confidence and started to fret that he wasn't getting enough milk and that I wasn't doing my job as 'dairy cow' well enough.  We called the midwife in a panic (and by 'we', I mean that Jon called as I was busy feeding and crying).  She suggested we get the latch checked again and get Paddington weighed to check he was getting fed, turns out, latch was fine and he'd put on weight so no need to worry - again, its just his character to feed for a long time (a lot of it is just comfort suckling and the way my milk runs) and he's a sparky (and greedy) little personality who gets frustrated if my milk comes out slower than he wants or if he's enjoying it so much he loses focus and slips off and then gets angry as he wants back on instantly.  I just need to give him more encouragement and attention when he latches to make sure he's doing it properly, not be afraid to take him off and do it again if he's not on right and give us both more credit for finding our rhythm and sticking to it - so what if its a long, noisy rhythm, its working so we'll keep at it.

He's got an appetite like his dad for sure.  He eats fast and with gusto.  He's also started making the cutest little enjoyment murmurs when feeding accompanied with outstretched fingers, gripping hands and stretched out legs which I'm pretty sure means he is enjoying himself - he's just an 'all in' kind of guy when it comes to food. I can appreciate that.

2. Do not suffer in silence - there are ways to alleviate painful boobs and nips.  The midwife recommended Jelonet paraffin gauges which have been a real winner - you just cut the sheets into squares that fit neatly over your nip after a feed and instantly soothe. Lanolin gel gently rubbed on the nips after every feed helps as well, and is even better applied underneath a paraffin gauge - double the comfort.  Cabbage leaves in the bra I wasn't sure about, but cold cabbage leaves, oh yes! Very refreshing on an engorged bosom - just don't forget you've left them in there as they start to smell, well, very cabbagey, when warm and left in overnight and actually only need a few minutes on the boob to do the trick anyway (its best if you give the leaves a little squeeze to break open the 'veins' first apparently and keep them in the fridge so they are really once and cool).  I wasn't really sure what breast pads were for until this week - leaky boobs stain tops, as does paraffin gel, and sore nips rubbing against bras is not fun.  Breast pads help with all of this.  Make sure you pack both breast pads and paraffin gauges in the changing bag as you'll need them when you are out and about feeding.

3. Public breast feeding is fine.  Did my first al-fresco, in front of people breast feeding this week, in a 12th century priory and field, as you do, which was a good confidence booster.  I used a large muslin cloth to cover Paddington from the sun and also just to give us some privacy, as we're still new at this, and people do stare - oh boy do they stare!  It went well and I actually felt quite empowered to be able to feed my baby at the breast in public.

4. Boys wee everywhere.  We learnt the hard, and pretty funny way, that when changing a baby boy's nappy, you need to make sure that their winky points down and that you've got a nappy in place to catch any 'flow'.  Not knowing this, we've been wee'd on several times as has the wall, floor, changing table and Paddington has also, bless him, wee'd all over himself and his own face a couple of times now.  At least we know all his piping works.

5. Nuclear nappies are 'normal' and the real meaning of bulk buying. The sticky merconium poo phase is over, this week its been weird seedy brown poo and yellow korma poop that can come out so forcefully that it trickles down his legs if we don't change the nappy quick enough. Still, there's been plenty of wet and poopy nappies (around 6-8 a day on average) which means, he is feeding well, so all is good. I did my first in-car, on my lap, nappy change when we were parked out and about this week too, in under 2 minutes, with no wee where it shouldn't have been or poo on the seats, which gave me a (probably disproportionate) sense of huge achievement and like I do really have my shit together (pun intended and oh how my life has changed...).

We thought we'd stocked up on loads of nappies, cotton wool and wipes to last about a month during pregnancy, well, I bought the wrong size nappies for a start (size 2 when our little boy is still in size 1's - I convinced myself when he was in utero that he was going to be a large baby hence I bought the next size up nappy - baby brain!) and we had massively underestimated the amount of nappy changes we'd be doing daily and how many cotton wool balls it takes to top and tail a baby and wipe dirty bottoms clean, so we had to re-stock again already.  This really takes bulk buying to another level.  Basically buy more of the essentials than you think you'll need, and look out for special offers and promotions to save money.  (Boots currently have a buy 1 get 1 half price on all cotton wool products deal and Groupon have a half price Pampers offer - and yes this is what excites me these days!)

6. Once again, step away from google.  Your baby is different to all other babies and what's normal for them, won't be for others. I think its going to take me some time to really grasp this fact.  I decided that Paddington still wasn't sleeping enough as was getting 7-8 hours a day and all the baby guide books and articles I'd read said newborns sleep all the time, on average 12 hours a day.  Well, not my newborn.  We spoke to the midwife who told us not to worry and introduced us to the concept of 'evening fussies', around 5-7pm, which is when Paddington has been the hardest to settle and get to sleep.  She said he was a very active and wiry young chap, who liked to be awake to feed and snuggle, and this was probably why he needed to feed so often too, as he was burning off what he was eating quickly by being so energetic.

I also learnt this week, to do somethings for myself, especially during long feeds.  Once we'd gotten the latch right and I knew Paddington was in it for the long haul and comfy, I started reading magazines, watching Friday Night Lights again (this is a new night feeds ritual and makes it seem like a 'normal' Netflix night rather than a chore - its all about the mindset), writing this blog, reading the stylist magazine on the iPad to keep in touch with my 'old' London life or just closing my eyes for a bit of a rest.  This makes breastfeeding less of a slog and more of my new way of life and routine.

7. Babies need to be told to or rather coaxed into, taking a nap.  I did not know this. I thought babies just slept when they were tired - ha!!!  Sounds completely foolish to write it down.  Part of my frustration in him not sleeping was that I just thought they were wired to do that.  I hadn't really considered that they needed help to settle down and sleep and why shouldn't they?!  They've been hurled into a big, wide, scary world after the safe cocoon of a womb, of course they need help getting to sleep! The swaddling still isn't working for Paddington, it just gets him worked up and makes him cry for longer.  We can't do the 'cry it out' method as his crying makes my boobs ache (what doesn't these days?!) and just breaks my heart, so its been a try everything approach this week.  Lots of ssshhhing sounds whilst rocking, a good winding session with back rubs and foot and leg massages as our midwife showed us (this can help his digestive system clear everything out apparently and he seems to quite like it), singing - he is a fan of Pearl Jam's 'Black' and 'Mr Jones' by the Counting Crows (as well as 'We are sailing' by Rod Stewart, thanks to my mum).   When in doubt, or when I've tried everything I can think of and am all tried out, I get the boob out, and this always works to settle him instantly, then once he's sated (which can take anywhere between half an hour to 2 hours so this isn't a quick fix!), he's usually milk drunk and ready for a snooze.

8. Babies really don't need that many clothes.  I think I knew this as I was buying my 8th pair of patterned leggings or that cute fleece lined hoody with the bear ears (this is, however, Pads fav outdoor coat and Jon's fav piece of baby clothing), but I have no regrets as I only bought super cute outfits (of course) and luckily, he fits into the smallest sizes I bought now, and I have the next sizes up ready to go when he's big enough.  There has been a few nappy accidents and mid nappy change wee incidents, which have meant several clothes changes in a day so I feel justified.  I could probably have done with just a few baby vests, t-shirt baby gros, sleepy suits with long arms and covered feet, leggings (again with covered feet are best as socks on a newborn are just annoying - they fall off constantly!), and a couple of cardigans for going outside/when its cold inside. (and a couple of hats too).  But at least we have lots of options and I could not do any washing for a week and we wouldn't run out of clothes.  We also hadn't considered that everyone is very generous when a new baby arrives so we've been gifted some gorgeous clothes, meaning I really didn't need to buy so much early on. Oh well. I'm making sure he gets to wear every outfit several times so I'll let myself have this one.

I only dress for breastfeeding myself these days, so whatever top is comfy, has easy access and doesn't leave me looking too naked when pulled down to get the boobs out, so at least I can enjoy dressing my little man stylishly.

9. Is that wind or a smile?!! This has been a windy week - Paddington needs a good few minutes winding between feeds - not between every feed necessarily but especially after a mammoth session, as he gets lots of hiccups, which frighten him and he just needs to be snuggled during those to comfort him.  (The hiccups are seriously cute on a baby.  He used to get them a lot in the womb, pretty much daily in the last few weeks, so it reminds me of pregnancy when he gets them and that makes me all gooey eyed and emotional - again). A few burps later however and he's usually much easier to settle.  He's not really been sick very much, I can count the number of times on one hand so far in fact, so I haven't really been using a muslin when winding him, which I should, as when he does 'possett' on the sheets or on me, it does make a mess/can stain a bit.  I've started keeping a muslin next to both sides of our bed, on the buggy, in the lounge, the car and the changing bag - anywhere we may both spend time basically so I'm never caught without wipe up material.  During some of these winding sessions, or after a feed, he makes this expression that I swear is a smile, but apparently its too early for him to be able to smile yet according to the midwife.  But it really looks like a smile.  Can we just pretend that it is?!!

10. There's an app for that mark 2.  This week's app is sleep orientated - obviously. I discovered, by accident, that Paddington likes the sound of the hairdryer.  He was restless and crying, I had wet hair, so I turned on the hairdryer to give myself a 1 minute blast before going back to try and settle the little man, and hey presto! He calmed down immediately and went from crying to staring at his surroundings quite contendedly for the full time it took me to rough dry my hair.  Result!  That evening, he was a grizzly bear again, so I turned on the hairdryer, and once again, it worked!  Fuelled by this amazing new discovery (I'm new to this remember, most mums know the joy of white noise already), I found an app that plays a hairdryer sound, as well as a vacuum, ssshing sounds and even a womb (its called 'Sound Sleeper' if you're interested).  During the next evening fussies, I didn't need to get out of bed and plug in the hairdryer, I just played it on my app and though he didn't settle quite as well as previously, it definitely helped, so now we have portable white noise powers.  This feels good. (We bought a Ewan the Dream sheep before Paddington entered the world, and have yet to see it work on him.  It works on Jon better, sending him to sleep with its comforting white noise or lullabies and red glow, but Paddington isn't fussed so far - I think it might be too quiet as the hairdryer was pretty loud? Jury is out anyway, but we'll keep trying it, as loads of mums swear by it.)

11. Sleep my old friend, we miss you (and sleep jealousy - the ugliest kind).  So 2 weeks of little to no sleep can really take its toll.  There's been more tears, big dips in confidence, questioning myself and my instincts when I know deep down that I'm doing ok, my eyes have definitely taken on a more sunken look with dark circles and there's been a lot of headaches this week.  I have snapped at Jon a couple of times out of tiredness and frustration which I'm not proud of.  He sleeps during feeds - why should he be awake when there's nothing he can really do once we're latched and settled in? - and then I didn't want to wake him afterwards so was doing the burpings and the inevitable nappy changes, then trying to settle Paddington which I was too tired to really put any gusto into, so would then acquiese to feeding again and so the cycle of no sleep would continue!  Jon would wake up after a few hours of good uninterrupted sleep, oblivious to the fact I had been at it for 4-5 hours straight and I'd be pissed at him. (Poor guy). This wasn't fair on either of us and so we have a new policy now, I just need to wake Jon up after a feed if I need some rest (I don't always as mostly I want to be able to deal with everything by myself in preparation for when Jon goes back to work and London next week and because I am stubborn) and he'll take over the winding and the nappy changing and trying to settle the wee bairn.  Simple really, but hard to figure out when you haven't slept!

Towards the end of the week our gorgeous little boy gave us 2 hours of sleep in a row and I was able to sleep for the same amount of time.  This was a real turning point, as the next evening he then slept for 3 and a half hours straight between feeds which pretty much felt like the best night's sleep I'd ever had.  When you have so little, any amount of sleep becomes magical and restorative. Long may this continue.

12. Getting out and about is great for your confidence and keeping your spirits up. We've done very well getting out of the house and shaking things up a bit this week.  This has really helped to keep my mood lifted.  We went to a 70th birthday party at a hotel on Day 8.  We weren't sure we would make it and as soon as we arrived we felt overwhelmed and wondered if we were just crazy for taking our newborn to a party so soon, but we aced it.  How? We only stayed for 20 minutes to say hello to all of our friends and the birthday man himself, let everyone meet Jack (all snuggled and sleeping in the 'daddy womb'/Ergo Baby carrier) and then we left.  It was just the right amount of time to be surrounded by so many people, it boosted our confidence that we could actually do it and was lovely to see all of our friends and watch them coo over our gorgeous little man and tell us how great we looked (whether they were just being kind or truthful I don't care, I'm taking the compliment!).

We also managed a lunch outing (see public breast feeding point 3) and our first family day out as a trio to Llantony Priory which was just what the doctor ordered.  We parked up and did a 1.5 hour breastfeeding session in the car and on a picnic bench - starting to understand that Paddington rules the roost now, and we are definitely on his time and playing by his rules! - then we had a walk around the priory, a pub ploughman's and another walk - followed by more al fresco feeding in a field and a refreshing nappy change for Pads with butterflies flying over his head and a gentle breeze helping to  dry off his nether regions.  Pads slept really well in the car there and in the sling during the walk so it felt like we were all getting exactly what we needed out of the day.  He didn't sleep so well in the car back, it was around 5.30pm so time for the evening fussies or grizzlies as I've renamed them, so we ended up parking in a lay-by over-looking the most spectacular vista of fields, hills and a castle, for a breastfeeding session with a view.  I like al fresco or in car breast feeding - mixes it up a bit.

13. Breastfeeding is thirsty work.  On our outing to Llantony Priory I learnt a valuable lesson.  Breastfeeding can make you dehydrated.  It is really important to keep drinking water during and in between feedings, not just for yourself, but also for your milk supply, as if dehydrated you might not be producing enough milk.  I hadn't realised that I had hardly had any water all day until I started feeling a bit faint, thirsty and light headed.  A bottle of water and a Fab lolly later (just in case my blood sugars were low you know), I felt much better.  From now on, I'll be packing a large bottle of water in the changing bag along with a snack (oatcakes/Welsh cakes and malt loaf are my current favs to keep my energy up), so I'm never caught short again, and before settling in for a feed at home, I'll be grabbing a large glass of water or squash first for me.

14. Mother's pride has seriously kicked in already. On Day 10 I had my first appointment with my lovely health visitor at home.  She checked Paddington over and was very impressed with his alertness and how active he is, commenting especially on his neck strength (she said he was displaying very sturdy neck muscles for this stage in his little life, able to almost support his own head when lifted up carefully by his arms when laying on his back in her lap) and very powerful leg kicking (I can attest to this as he's currently feeding and nearly kicked the computer off the sofa with a particularly enthusiastic leg thrust just now).  He loves a good thrash around of the limbs and he can push himself away from you really forcefully when holding him so you have to make sure you've got him nice and securely at all times.  All of this just made me swell with pride that my little boy is growing and developing so well and has tonnes of feisty character already. He's going to be a rugby player we think. Or pro snowboarder/skateboarder/surfer/Wimbledon contender.  Watch this space!

15. Baby sneezes don't mean that they have a cold. Pads has been sneezing more this week so I got worried that he'd picked up his first cold so asked my midwife to check him over.  Turns out baby sneezing, as well as being utterly adorable, is just their way of clearing out their nasal and respiratory passages, so no Kleenex required.  She also confirmed that his cold hands and feet were due to bad circulation that all babies have for the first month or so, and didn't mean that he was cold. Good to know.  (The best way to see if they are too hot or cold is to place your hand on their chest or back of their neck - nicely warm and pink mean they are ok, clammy or hot mean exactly that.  Easy when you know how.)

16. Its all worth it.  Our little bear is starting to stare & notice the world around him more this week which makes everything we've all been through so worthwhile.  He's growing and developing under our care - now that is rewarding.  I put him in his moses basket to try and get him used to laying on his back more and being on his own, and placed a penguin rattle toy next to him.  He stared disbelievingly at this toy for 45 minutes, gurgling happily and wriggling around while I was able to get some stuff done and just keep an eye on him.  It felt so good to see him content and quiet - I was one proud mamma.  I am going to look into more development games and techniques as this felt really good for both of us.

17. Paddington is official. We got the little man registered on Day 13 and it was a (happy) emotional time.  We then registered him at the doctor's too so we ticked off two big milestones in his life, and he got his first letter addressed to him confirming his nhs details - our boy is on the books now, big day!

We can't believe our little boy is 2 weeks old already.  Weirdly, this fortnight has flown by as well as being some of the longest days and nights we've ever experienced.  Loving this parenthood malarky, luckily the journey has only just begun.